I recently saw a quote from Jamie Lee Curtis that said “The word ‘anti-aging’ has to be struck. I am pro-aging. I want to age with intelligence, and grace, and dignity, and verve, and energy.”
I love this! I am firmly in the pro-aging camp.
In his article “Old Age is Not a Pathology,” Eric Weiner says that old age is the last terra incognita, or unknown land. “There are few road maps, and even fewer role models. Sure, there are plenty of old people impersonating young people, but they are role models for old people impersonating young people. They are not role models for growing old.”
Do we need a map or philosophy for aging? Philosophy helps us define our terms. Chronological age misses the mark. It is meaningless. It doesn’t tell us anything about a person other than the number of years he has been on the planet. Contrary to the myriad ads in magazines and commercials on TV, old age is not a disease. It is not a pathology. It is not abnormal. It is not a problem.
In defining our terms, we need to remember that old age is a continuum, and everyone, whether they like it or not, is on it. “Aging, in and of itself, is a subtle, quiet process,” says Marie Bernard, MD, deputy director of the National Institute on Aging. It is time for aging metrics to account for the new reality of today’s old age, including how well the elderly function. Aging is a privilege. It’s about how to do it gracefully, with humor, self-love and a respect for the process.
Betty Friedan said, “Aging is not lost youth but a new stage of opportunity and strength.” And William Holden thought “Aging is an inevitable process. I surely wouldn’t want to grow younger. The older you become, the more you know; your bank account of knowledge is much richer.”
Why is there so much research on “successful aging” (whatever that means!) and books on preventive medicine, exercise, diet, skin care regimens and so much more? Why are we treating the opportunity of growing older as something we must manage? We have a society that desperately clings to the importance of remaining youthful, often at the expense of the mental and physical health of those who are able to reach higher ages.
The WHO report says that ageism influences health through three pathways:
- Psychological – negative age stereotypes can exacerbate stress;
- Behavioral – negative self-perceptions of ageing predict worse health behavior, such as noncompliance with prescribed medications
- Physiological – negative age stereotypes predict detrimental brain changes decades later, including the accumulation of plaques and tangles and reduction in the size of the hippocampus, conditions connected to Alzheimer’s Disease.
Yet, we in the U.S. are not alone in appreciating and honoring the youthful. According to the World Health Organization, every second person in the world is believed to hold ageist attitudes, which lead to poorer physical and mental health, increased social isolation and loneliness, greater financial insecurity and reduced quality of life and premature death for older persons, costing societies billions of dollars each year.
This can also translate into seniors not asking for the help they need, staying in homes that are not safe, going without proper nutrition, not taking medications correctly and so many more scenarios based on not wanting to feel old and ask others for help.
If you know a senior who needs assistance, enlist the help of a Senior Housing Advisor to find a community (Assisted Living, Memory Care, or Adult Family Home) that honors them. These communities provide the care they need in a setting that graciously supports their independence for as long as possible. They provide the care they deserve, without judgment, when they need it.
Adrienne Miller is Chief Care Officer at Forever Care Services.
206-383-2001
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